Dana

The 11th of February was 3yrs since I lost my Ladiebug. That was such a hard day, letting her go broke my soul. She had mammary cancer that had spread to her lungs and heart. This made it hard for her to breathe and she’d become lethargic due to her heart. But even so every morning about 5am she’d wake us up for her walk if we weren’t already up. Our walks got shorter and slower at the end, but she still got so excited to go. I knew that the cancer was really starting to affect her, but she stayed this beautiful, happy girl till the end. Her last was spent doing all her favorite things. After her walk I made her a special breakfast of chicken with strawberries, blueberries, cheese and pumpkin. After which she and I shared a bowl of her favorite cereal, Captain Crunch with crunch berries, bite for bite. And of course she finished off the leftover milk. I then took a washcloth and wiped her fur down and gave her a thorough brushing. Then I sat on the floor next to her and gave her a very long, gentle massage from head to tail. Halfway through she leaned over putting her full weight on me with a soft grruufffft escaping as she collapsed into my arms. We layed on her bed and took a nap together for about an hour or so. I wrapped her up in my arms, holding her with my head on her chest I listened to her heartbeating so strong. We spent some time out in the yard where she made her rounds, sniffing everything throughly, as if she knew this was to be her last time doing it. I believe that she knew that it was her last day here with me, in the place she’d come to love. For lunch she had roast beef, cottage cheese and King’s Hawaiian dinner rolls. (She loved all bread, but those were her favorite and I always shared them with her bite for bite) and for dessert she got a big bowl of fresh whipped cream. We cuddled on the couch and watched Homeward Bound, her favorite movie and napped until a few friends and their dogs came by to say goodbye. She was lavished with…[Read more]

Well it’s been awhile since I.ve written. Been busy. Grunt-Grunt’s hind legs are getting worse, but she still does her best to maneuver around. I didn’t have to build her wheelchair after all. I found a charity online called High Rollers Club that caters to Pugs who need wheelchairs and can’t afford them. I just have to promise to return the chair when Grunt-Grunt can no longer use it. It recently arrived and we’re getting her used to it now. I’ve spoken to the vet and she said that as long as she stays a happy dog, eating and drinking there’s no reason she can’t live to a ripe old age even being paralyzed. This was a comfort to me, as she is my sanity, my best friend. without her i’d be so vey lonely. My fiancé is battling lung cancer and has a spinal disease that leaves him bedbound much of the time, leaving me alone much of the time, except for my Grunt-Grunt. Aug 26th was the 5yr anniversary of my Bears passing and itnwas awesome, for 3 nights before I would be having a nightmare and suddenly I would turn around to see that great big black ball of fur standing there barking and wagging his tail at me. The sight of him changed my nightmare into a much more pleasant dream. The first night seeing him was so real that I woke up and actually looked for him for a minute, until I woke up completely and realized that it was just him visiting me to say hello and that he loved me still. Then when Jim got his cancer diagnosis he was sleeping on the couch having a nightmare, (you could tell, he was moaning and crying out) I saw our Ladiebug standing next to the couch, her nose almost touching his, and I swear I heard her do her quiet little burff and he seemed to calm down, then she was gone. I truly believe that our pets come back to see us from time to time, especially during times of great duress. Ladiebug and Bear protected us while here, and they continue to do so now. God I miss them.

I’m very sad tonight as I look upon the faces of the last two babies I’ve lost. My Flat coated retriever Bear, (8/26/16) and my blk lab mix Ladiebug (2/11/19). I lost them both to cancer. Bear I had from before he was born and Ladiebug I had 2 mo & 9 days shy of 2 yrs. Each of their passings allowed for me to rescue another dog. With Ladiebug, 13 days after I lost her I learned of a 7 yr old Pug that was going to be put down because she was “too old, and no one will want a dog with a bad eye.” She’d scratched a hole in her corena due to an ear infection neglected for too long. Well now I’m seeing the Pug, Grunt-Grunt, starting to age very fast, her health declining, her back legs starting to give out. I know that her time is coming much sooner than I can accept right now. So I sit and talk to the pictures of Bear and Ladiebug, asking them to be with her when the time comes so she won’t be alone at all. Because I’ll be holding her tightly in my arms here, until she’s crossed over to the Rainbow Bridge. She’s such an amazing dog. Always happy, has this cute little “indoor voice”. So in tune with my emotions. I have been blessed by the fact that all 3 of these babies have been certified service dogs. Bear was seizure and PTSD, Ladiebug was seizure and Grunt-Grunt is PTSD. I will survive, my heart will continue to beat, but I nor my heart will ever be the same. Thank God, as I have become a better person thanks to my dogs. Thanks