• Christie posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

    Toni thank you for your kind words. I wouldn’t have wanted Colby to suffer and we did what we had to do but it is still hard not having him here. I miss him so much but I know he is healed and not suffering. I will try to be apart of the meetings. I know I would feel better sharing my story.
    • Hello everyone, sorry I haven’t touched base lately. My Husband Mom passed away on Oct 21. We were heading to Toronto at the time. Been a hard time

      • Oh Christina, I am so very, very sorry. June, and now your mother in law. I’ve been through a series of close losses and in a way, you are already in a bereaved state and possibly better able to move through them? I wish you and your family the ability to recall fond, fun memories, and find join with those. {HUGE HUG} Toni
      • Gracie posted an update 2 years, 10 months ago

        What can I say about my precious Gizmo. I first met him at the end of April 2008. I had been doing extensive research to find out what kind of dog would be the best for woman my mother’s age. She was about to be an empty nester as I was moving away, my middle sister was getting married, and my youngest sister was graduating high school. Yorkshire Terriers kept coming up in my research and one day, out of the blue, we saw an advertisement in our local paper for Yorkie puppies. When I took my mother to see him, it was love at first sight.

        There was no question they belonged together. We had to wait two more weeks until he was ready to be picked up. During that time, my mother went out and bought any books about Yorkies she could find and all the beds, toys, supplies needed for a new Yorkie puppy. Gizmo and my mother were inseparable. My sisters and I would joke that Gizmo became her favorite kid. She never went anywhere without him, even took him to work with her.

        Then, in February of 2014, my mother unexpectedly passed away. I was devastated and went to a really dark place. Gizmo saved my life. It was his cuddles, kisses, and presence that gave me a reason to wake up in the morning. In a way, he became a surrogate for my mother. He provided me unconditional love. I am single and live alone. He was the one I would talk to about my day when I would come home from work. He went with me everywhere when I wasn’t working. He was my best friend. We experienced so many life events together. Other than an torn ACL in 2021, he was pretty healthy.

        On February 15, 2023, I woke up to Gizmo struggling to breathe. A trip to the emergency vet unearthed a diagnosis of pulmonary hypertension. Gizmo’s age was catching up with him. He did well on his medication and we spend a good 8 months together where he seemed like his old self.

        Then, on September 21, his breathing became labored again. Another trip to the emergency vet. His pulmonary hypertension had gotten worse. They upped his medication. Then, three days later, he started having what I call “episodes”. It wasn’t until September 29, after a bad episode that saw us back in the ER, that I discovered these episodes he was having were seizures. He spent a week at home with me and proceeded to have a seizure every day. He started refusing his treats which then made it difficult to give him his medication. By the weekend, he was hardly eating. And he wasn’t walking as much. He would spend most of his time laying down and sleeping. And he would withdraw himself to my dark walk in closet instead of his usual places.

        Then, on October 8, he had three seizures in the span of 8 hours. I remember holding him close to me after his second seizure and asking him to give me a sign that it was his time. About 30 minutes later, he sat up in bed and just looked at me with his deep brown eyes. I asked him if he needed to go potty or outside since this is how he usually indicated to be he need to do one of those things. He just continued to stare into my eyes for several minutes. Was this the sign I was looking for?

        Then, he had his third seizure about 2 hours later. It was a really bad one. Rushed him to the ER. They explained he was experiencing cluster seizures. I was numb and in a blur of what was going on. I made the dreaded decision that day. I have been filled with such guilt and regret every since, wondering if there was more I could have done for him.

        15 years, 6 months, and 27 days…that’s how long I was blessed to have Gizmo in my life. I would give anything to have just one more day with him.

        • No, Colleen, there is no place for guilt here, although you may feel it, and question yourself. What you did for Gizmo was selfless, generous and loving. He was not getting better and you saved him from having a seizure, possibly falling and breaking his back or something horrible. To not gift him a peaceful release would have been unkind. Your story is so moving, for many reasons, and I hope you find some relief sharing it with our caring community. When we say we empathize, and understand, we mean it. We have collectively said heartfelt goodbyes to our most beloved best friends. It brings a very deep pain, but is also a lovely gift to have shared the lives you and Gizmo did. Please, if you can, join our group Nov. 16th and tell us more. I am, we are, thinking of you with sincere sympathy. Toni
          (Meeting links are under “Events”)
          • Colleen, I am so sorry for your loss if Gizmo 💔 What a beautiful little boy he was. I wish there was something I could say to help ease your pain. It’s the most gut wrenching feeling when we lose our fur babies. My heart hurts for you.
            Sending you warm thoughts and comforting hugs at this very sad time 💔
          • Kellie posted an update 2 years, 10 months ago

            Our Gracie, she was 15 we had to say goodbye to her last week
          • Toni Noel posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

            What a sweet face. I am so sorry for your loss.💔May we hear about your precious baby? Toni
            • @keeleynicolai4 Hello Keeley, welcome to our caring community. Please tell us about your baby, and share some photos if you like. I am sorry for your loss and hope you are doing okay? How ARE you doing? We’re here for you💔Toni

            • Toni Noel posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

              Christie, that is so very hard – to see our babies falter and suffer. The morning my girl had her second seizure I took her in and we said goodbye. I felt “good” about her peacefully passing rather than falling from another seizure, but the pain of coming home to an empty house knowing she was never going to be here again, that is brutal. The pain is deep and we have to go through it. It’s sort of the payment we make for our years of love and joy together. You gave Colby the most selfless, generous and kind gift – release and relief. 💔Sometimes I think we wait too long to help them because we can’t stand the idea of saying goodbye. You love Colby enough to think only of his best interest. I hope you will join our group meeting Nov. 16th – it is good to share your story and we are here for you, Christie. With my deepest sympathy, Toni.
              (Meetings are under “Events”)
              • Toni Noel posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                That song pulls tears right from our souls. 💔 Do you find a strange sort of comfort in your pain and grief – as if confirming your love of Autumn? That would be normal. Can you also find joy in your memories by listening to upbeat music, and looking at fun photos from ealier in your relationship?I hope you allow yourself to be happy and grateful for the life you and Autumn shared, too. She will live in your heart forever. Please join our group Nov. 16th. I think you may find comfort talking to our kind group. {BIG HUGS} Toni
                • Autumn's mom Betsy posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                  This song makes me cry because I miss my cat Autumn mom beautiful baby girl

                • Christie posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                  Colby was 13 years old and we have been his family since he was born. He was a mommas boy and he was always with me. Colby started having seizures on 10-29 and the emergency vet tried to stop them but was unsuccessful so we had to let Colby go. It was the hardest thing we have ever had to do. It’s been 7 days and I am still struggling with Colby not being here. He was my baby. We miss him so much.
                  • Hi you all this is Autumn mom she was only four years old when she passed away on September 12 2023 it really broke my heart ♥. It was so hard to let her go because she was my baby girl didn’t go to sleep four days when she passed away on me.

                    • This song makes me cry because I miss my cat Autumn mom beautiful baby girl

                    • That song pulls tears right from our souls. 💔 Do you find a strange sort of comfort in your pain and grief – as if confirming your love of Autumn? That would be normal. Can you also find joy in your memories by listening to upbeat music, and looking at fun photos from ealier in your relationship?I hope you allow yourself to be happy and grateful for the life you and Autumn shared, too. She will live in your heart forever. Please join our group Nov. 16th. I think you may find comfort talking to our kind group. {BIG HUGS} Toni
                      • Thank you so much Toni Noel
                      • Autumn's mom Betsy posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                        Thank you so much
                        • Toni Noel posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                          Christie, of course you are in deep pain, a pain like no other. It hurts at a cellular, soulful level, doesn’t it? 💔 Do you think that is because you and your baby shared so much love, joy and fun, and a unique relationship, that the pain of parting is made that much more acute? May I ask how long you were together? How old was this little darling? Was it unexpected? Please tell us more, Christie. And please jin our online kind, understanding group Nov. 16th to talk about everyting. We are here for you with empathy and {{BIG HUGS}}. Toni
                          Meeitng info is under “Events”
                          • Christie posted an update 2 years, 10 months ago

                            Lost our fur baby on 10-29-23. My heart is broken. Depressed!
                            • Christie, of course you are in deep pain, a pain like no other. It hurts at a cellular, soulful level, doesn’t it? 💔 Do you think that is because you and your baby shared so much love, joy and fun, and a unique relationship, that the pain of parting is made that much more acute? May I ask how long you were together? How old was this little darling? Was it unexpected? Please tell us more, Christie. And please jin our online kind, understanding group Nov. 16th to talk about everyting. We are here for you with empathy and {{BIG HUGS}}. Toni
                              Meeitng info is under “Events”
                              • Colby was 13 years old and we have been his family since he was born. He was a mommas boy and he was always with me. Colby started having seizures on 10-29 and the emergency vet tried to stop them but was unsuccessful so we had to let Colby go. It was the hardest thing we have ever had to do. It’s been 7 days and I am still struggling with Colby not being here. He was my baby. We miss him so much.
                                • Christie, that is so very hard – to see our babies falter and suffer. The morning my girl had her second seizure I took her in and we said goodbye. I felt “good” about her peacefully passing rather than falling from another seizure, but the pain of coming home to an empty house knowing she was never going to be here again, that is brutal. The pain is deep and we have to go through it. It’s sort of the payment we make for our years of love and joy together. You gave Colby the most selfless, generous and kind gift – release and relief. 💔Sometimes I think we wait too long to help them because we can’t stand the idea of saying goodbye. You love Colby enough to think only of his best interest. I hope you will join our group meeting Nov. 16th – it is good to share your story and we are here for you, Christie. With my deepest sympathy, Toni.
                                  (Meetings are under “Events”)
                                  • Toni thank you for your kind words. I wouldn’t have wanted Colby to suffer and we did what we had to do but it is still hard not having him here. I miss him so much but I know he is healed and not suffering. I will try to be apart of the meetings. I know I would feel better sharing my story.
                                    • Christie, it is such a mess of emotions and thoughts – in our heads we know we did the best for our beloved, but our heart and whole soul are bereaved. Please do join us if you can. I will be thinking of you. Toni
                                      • Christie, I am so, so sorry for your loss of Colby 💔
                                        • Thank you so much.
                                        • Toni Noel posted a new activity comment 2 years, 10 months ago

                                          Laurie, How is Murphy? How are you holding up? I think of you every day, many times. Toni
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